I haven't posted in awhile, and I am not posting because there is a large demand for me to post... actually there is no demand to post. I'm just doing it one to get some credit, but also just to write some stuff out.
I've been thinking a lot about hate, racism, struggles, and all that. I've never been a person to hate someone because they are black, latino, white, asian, or whatever. I have stereotyped people before of all races, I'm not going to lie, and I am sure we all have. I have made racist jokes before, but it was all in good fun... no matter how tasteless the fun was. Struggles... Struggle is such a broad term that it depends on how you define struggle. Education struggle? Struggle in life? I personally have lived a pretty easy life(after 12 years old) with very few roadblocks. I feel most of the problems from age 12 to the present, I probably could have prevented them. Maybe that's because I feel I'm at fault on so many occasions. There are definitely times where I have had no control over a situation. But for as long as I can remember, I do not recall that many events.
I don't know exactly the reason for that is, but I would probably have to attribute that to my parents hard work. They worked extremely hard to get our family out of some crappy apartment in California, to the suburbs in Virginia. As soon as I get a job where I make a decent money, I hope to repay them for the service they did to me. I'm not boasting about my life or anything of that nature, because at the best it's an alright life. But I feel that some people who complain about life being too hard, they are just lazy or making mountains out of moles. Granted, there are people who have to deal with serious shit, but I know for a fact that there are people out there who cry literally about nothing and complain about shit that they can get out of. Especially the kids who's parents are in good jobs, who make good money, and put them in a good situation, they owe it to their parents to go out and at least try to make something out of themselves.
Then again... who cares what I say. People don't like being told what to do, and that is fine. Personally, I feel in debt to my parents. They could have done a terrible job at raising me, they could have not loaned me money when I needed it, they could have not been there for me when I needed them, and they could have given up when times got tough. I feel the least I could do to them is to show them thanks, and somehow repay them in the future. They deserve it.
Now that I think about it, I have struggled some in my life. Growing up with immigrant parents(I am a born US Citizen), I had to teach myself a lot of things that other kids were taught by their parents. This is in no way a knock on my parents, because they simply couldn't teach me the alphabet, american sports, read English. I learned from Barney and Sesame Street like every other immigrant in California. I could have gone into ESOL or Hilt, but I never did. I was always a proud child and never wanted to ask for help. I have always been at a disadvantage educationally and fiscally early in my life, but one thing my parents did enstill into me at a young age was a work ethic, which to this day has not faltered. Although at times I may be lazy; when I work on something, I try my best on it and hope all turns out well.
Because right now as a student who is living off his parents, life is pretty easy. But I know as soon as I walk out into the real world, life can get really shitty real fast. I've seen this through working at a gas station for the last 2-3 years. You see people of all ages, from all walks of life, walk through that door and some of have an infectious smile while others stare at me with a ghastly grimace. Some smoke their troubles away, while others drink till the pains gone. I see the human for what it is in every customer I help at my gas station. Because although everyone is different, we are all pieces of the puzzle that is man kind. Put those pieces together and you see a picture. The picture I see is that life can be hard to you, life can be rewarding to you, and at times life can be downright horrible. This is something I have grown to accept because it's hard to make the world a better place. It is too big of a challenge for one person to take. That being said, I don't feel like we shouldn't do our part to try and help each other out. I have just accepted the fact that people will suffer, hell I may even suffer. But, I feel like you have to go through the shitty times to really appreciate the good times. I know this sounds corny as shit, but we all struggle in life.
But no one wants to struggle, and neither do I. I don't want to live a crappy life where I'm in debt to the bank, I'm broke and I can barely feed myself. I want to live a good life. I feel like I can dictate my life, but then again I am still a naive 19 year old living with his parents. I haven't had my dreams crushed yet. But then again, I realize that life isn't easy. But I feel like you can overcome it. My parents, who came to America with not that much money, no contacts or relatives nearby, and no English experience; decided that America would be a better place to raise their children rather in Pakistan (which would soon become the warzone it is today). They sacrificed everything for my siblings and I. Life wasn't easy for them, my Dad drove in a taxi for 19 hours a day to make rent, and would study English and computers during his free time. My mom had to deal with 3 kids in a cramped apartment with a very low budget. I can't imagine the hardships they went through during my young age. I can only say is that if they can get out of a crummy situation like that, and life moderately well today, what is stopping any of us from following our own dreams.
Unless you are extremely lucky in life, you will struggle. I'm going to struggle, and I'm going to hate it. But what will determine what kind of person you are is how you react to those struggles. Will you lay down and let the struggle defeat you, or will you stand up and try to make the best out of the situation. I realize there are some situations, no matter how hard you try, you may not get out of. You can only hope for the best and keep trying.
This kind of sounded like a pep talk, but I was trying to touch on my personal struggles and struggles I see people around me facing everyday. I guess I'll talk about hate next time.
BTW GO CAPS!!!!!!!!
